So why do I always feel that? I know that life isn't meant to be wasted on such feelings, so why the heck are they going through my head anyways? It's so bad to be feeling that, but nonetheless, I do feel that. so so long ago, and yet it's all still there.
Words may die and images may fade, but memories are still here. No matter how vague they become, they're there.
And then what?
Do you allow yourself to wallow in the past without not once ever looking to the present and the future? Your heart might be able to move on that easily but mine can't. Mine stays attached...to pull away is to sever a life force. Dead dead dead.
I don't even get the chance to fix it anymore because I was never given one!
This world is cruel, I know that, and I still find it unfair. To you, to you this is so trivial isn't it? A foolish heart. But to me, it kills me. It kills me knowing that I can do nothing to save you.
But, maybe you're all right now. Maybe that's what it all boils down to. that I never saved you, that I was never a good influence on you. I was just there. And when you didn't want it anymore, you dropped it and I wasn't there. And then that was that.
'so it goes'. Is that it?
You know what? I just can't accept that. I must be a real masochist then. Because trying to save your soul is going to end up destroying mine in the process. But I'm still willing to make that sacrifice; must make me a fool,too...
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